Wednesday, June 22, 2005

Agnostic...Are you one of them?

It is more than often I hear, "I'm Agnostic..." Pardon me, there is nothing wrong with such...F.Y.I 'Agnostic' is defined as a person who believes that nothing can be known about the existence of God or of anything except material things. [I look it up from my old Oxford Dictionary I use to carry, getting through my 'spelling' test, which is a total nitemare]

I couldn't get the Cab driver, but I will not give up as surely I want to share the goodness of God to him. I find that often, when we use God as our own purpose, we get disappointed and drift into this 'Agnostic mode'. Let's 'borrow' some words from the Bible, "Obsession with self in these matters is a dead end; attention to God leds us out into the open, into a spacious, free life." Give it a thought...

Dad had been suffering from mix Bio-Polar Disorder for months till we [mainly with the assistance with my younger brother to make it possible] manage to convince him to seek medical help. Dad often indulges in self-pity and the 'angel of death' bring thoughts to him, many a time, he wanted to end his life. 'Angel of death' is as real as we hate it to be, yet the knowing that 'it' is merely a creation of our father in Heaven, God is enough to know nothing can possible harm us when our faith dwells in Psalm 91, "...No Evil will befall you, Nor will any plague come near your tent...Because HE has loved Me..." a promise unlike from man, that will never cease to fail...

Tuesday morning, my brother came into my room and asked me to pray spiritually with him. I took my Bible and went into his room, we prayed for the Grace of God to heal the family, critically our Dad and our beloved little sister. Jesus said, 'When two or more are gathered, my presence will be felt..." In the Bible, it says 'The Armor of God', is the 'Sword of the Spirit..." The sword cut through the house with with our strong desire for 'shalom'; peace, health, wholeness and prosperity. We thank Jesus for his precious blood washing away our sins we carry and taking our heavy yoke of hoping our Dad and Sister to be well...it is a long prayer, nevertheless we did not stop till we feel the peace...

Surely the evil spirits left, yet it is the faith in them [Dad & Sis] that can keep them away from the Deception of the Devil as the 'roaring lion' seek to devour us daily...we can only pray for the truth that oppose the lies. I was thinking without God, does it makes sense? Do we come to this World by pure accident? The fellowship of Trinity; Thy Father, Thy Son and Thy Spirit constantly shows nothing but love...I would think though we are unique with our personality, each of us daily seems to seek our purpose of life and life must have some profound meaning rather than the doses of material needs...

Rick Warren captured much of my attention when he wrote about 'What drive life?". Many of us are driven by guilt and I am one of them. I spend my life running from regrets and allowing my past to control my future. I simply fail to realize I can do amazing things. Many of us are driven by resentment and anger as I hold hurts on me and never seem to get over them. "Resentment always hurt you more than it does the person you resent...Those who have hurt you in the past cannot continue to hurt you now unless you hold on to the pain through resentment." I realize I am progressively letting it go and learning from it, unconsciously till I read the lines...

I know people who spent most of their life driven by materialism with the drive to have more and having more does not seem to make them happy, on the contrary, such makes one insecure and possesions only provide temporay happiness. "Fear is a self-imposed prison that keep you from becoming what God intends for you to be." I found myself building my own prison and realizing, true wealth is something that can never be taken away from us, store deeply in our heart; Love with God. Do you live on the expectations of others? Driven by parents, spouses or 'mentor' in our life? Are you often worried by what others might think? It is true the main key of failure is to try to please everyone but The Lord says, "No one can serve two masters."

All these seem to be common sense to you and me, yet we make these mistakes daily, living a life driven by fear, material wealth, expectations, resentment and guilt. "The greatest tragedy is not death, but life without purpose." Stress, conflict and fatigue often seems to be claimed by our delusion as we try the impossible of pleasing everyone daily.

I do not know about you but I want to find my purpose in life and these days, what matters to me most is what God says, who cares what others say? It is God who gave me life...I find it really hard to be agnostic...at times, the irony does set in.

"But He said, "The things that are impossible with people are possible with God." Luke 18:27

1 comment:

Ann said...

Bro, hehe, God leads, He never drives,

think that is why, sometimes we find it hard to follow a living God then a set of rules. Cuz set of rules can easily fullfill our ego self, but in God's system,He is the one in front and drive out all the obstables and barries, we as sheep follow.. beh beh, blur blur without doing anything, just follow, think tat would be hard for certain ppl :)